Perspective

This weekend I heard some terrible news. A former well loved teacher from my high school, along with his wife and another innocent woman, were all murdered in Myrtle Point. The motive? The authorities aren't saying or don't know. All they know is that a neighbor of theirs went and shot his wife and then went over and shot and killed the Cottams, and then inexplicably set the houses on fire. News article about the triple homicide here .
This kind of news is always troubling, but especially so when you know the person. I never had him as a teacher but I definitely knew who he was and he was also one of my sister's favorite teachers in high school. I was up all night after I heard, thinking of the families and all the former students mourning their loss. I couldn't come to terms with why they had to die such a violent, horrific death. I still can't.
No matter how hard I try, I cannot wrap my mind around why innocent people have to die. It may sound cynical, but it's one of  the main reasons I am not religious. I really have a hard time believing that a "just and fair" God would watch over such violence with little justice in this earthly life. It just tears me up inside to see a monster murder people in cold blood and cause heartache for countless friends and family members and yet the perpetrator walks the earth alive and well.
Between this, the Sandy Hook shootings, the Boston bombings and everyday violence that pervades our society, it just gets me down. Something is wrong in America and something has to change. THIS IS NOT NORMAL. Sure there are always a few "loose nuts" that will always slip through the cracks of society and cause mayhem, but overall I believe people are good and something is happening to make them "not good", for lack of a better term. Of course I don't have all the answers, I wish I did. I have theories though. I think one of the main things our society is lacking is funding and an honest forthright conversation about mental health in this country. Another thing that has always bothered me is the immersion and normalization of extreme violence in the U.S. We are so de-sensitized to it and access to guns is at an all time high.
Most of all, I hate that I have to raise my sons in a country where I am forced to explain why innocent, good people get murdered on a daily basis. Joel and I have talked numerous times about packing up the kids and pets and leaving our lives behind to go live in Denmark or The Netherlands. It's our utopia. It's a dream. And if this ridiculous violence shit doesn't start to get better, you may just find us there in the future!
As for the Cottams, they don't have a future,  but their son is trying to turn tragedy into triumph. If you would like to donate and read about what he is doing in his parent's name go here. I am very inspired by his ingenuity in the face of such grief.
Meanwhile, I will hold my family a little bit closer and say "I love you" as often as I can because this life is not guaranteed and if I die tomorrow, I want my kids and my husband to have no doubt about how much I love them!
RIP Renae and Lola Cottam......